Kuwana ndimbuya

Kana munhu achida kuti chinhu chaanodisisa chibudirire akafanira kunyengerera uya anogona kumumiririra kuti achiwane.

In order to marry a girl one cannot bypass her grandmother.

One must engage and win the support of those person(s) of influence in succeeding in matters of importance.

In the traditional context, marriage was a family to family affair moreso than it is today in the contemporary Zimbabwean society. Before informing the relatives the suitor had to woo the young lady and this involved ensuring that her grandmother considered him a worthy suitor. The grandmother in most cases was the girl’s first teacher and played an instrumental role in inculcating values in the girl. The grandmother also played a key role in the initiation of the girl where she would be taught of the kind of qualities she must seek in a husband. The grandmother would also have knowledge about the family of a potential suitor and was in a position to communicate with the grandmother or other persons of interest in the suitor’s family. Basically she was was a safe haven for the girl’s secrets. Because of this, young girls would when being courted would seek their grandmother’s opinions on the potential suitor and their family. Hence our elders realized that just as the grandmother has to be approached in marriage affairs, one must, in important matters, always act through a person of influence.

The proverb is used to advise on the importance of attracting the support of person(s) with influence on a particular venture or person if one is to succeed in complex endeavours. The proverb can be used in contemporary situation to advise on how one embarks on an advocacy strategy, which is by ensuring they engage key people in positions of influence.